Sitters Vs Standers

[Daryl Zero]

Gee, I feel like I'm missing out here. Other than my run ins with the stomach flu at home I have never come close to shitting my pants in public.
.

Never trust a fart.

Here I sit all broken hearted.
Tried to shit but only farted.
Then I went to a chance.
Tried to fart, but shit my pants.

[Olsondogg]

Life changer:



http://luxebidet.com/neo120.html" target="_blank

[Puerco]

Every toilet in Japan has one of those things.

[Merkin]

Every toilet in Japan has one of those things.

The public toilets in Japan are truly amazing. Every single one was heated.

And for guys in the US:

[Carcassdragger]

I consider myself an expert at shitting outdoors.

The very best places are on a hillside with a view and on two rocks with a downslope V in between so as to lift and separate the butt cheeks.

Next preferred is one flat rock on which to set one butt cheek thereby providing some separation and a resting perch.

If in the sandy desert, a good choice is the horizontal tree branch hang This technique is performed after selecting a horizontal mesquite or ironwood branch at about chest level and hanging off from it using both arms. Quite comfortable and effective.

Some years ago, I purchased a bumper dumper which is a toilet seat sttached to the male part of a receiver hitch. Just choose a spot on a remote road, preferably with a view, plug in the bumper dumper and let er go while enjoying a nice sit down.

Regarding squatting when a toilet seat is available, I'll choose sitting-regardless of the sphincter area relief-as it provides a nice respite to get some reading done.

Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?

[EastCoastCat]

CD - that has to be one of the all-time posts on these boards. I am in complete and utter amazement over your subject matter expertise around shitting.

I genuflect to you sir...

[pc in NM]

CD, a truly great dissertation on trail waste management…

… however, I think the last paragraph must have been deleted.

The last step?

[dovecanyoncat]

I consider myself an expert at shitting outdoors.

The very best places are on a hillside with a view and on two rocks with a downslope V in between so as to lift and separate the butt cheeks.

Next preferred is one flat rock on which to set one butt cheek thereby providing some separation and a resting perch.

If in the sandy desert, a good choice is the horizontal tree branch hang This technique is performed after selecting a horizontal mesquite or ironwood branch at about chest level and hanging off from it using both arms. Quite comfortable and effective.

Some years ago, I purchased a bumper dumper which is a toilet seat sttached to the male part of a receiver hitch. Just choose a spot on a remote road, preferably with a view, plug in the bumper dumper and let er go while enjoying a nice sit down.

Regarding squatting when a toilet seat is available, I'll choose sitting-regardless of the sphincter area relief-as it provides a nice respite to get some reading done.

Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?

My Brother!

All our other BDW brethren are scratching their heads right now HAR! If all the above is not instinctive in your total body muscle memory when time comes to take a dump you're not a player!

One thing I might add to round out the nuances of shitting in the woods: Before the squat you simply must account for all your accoutrement. Belts, straps, harnesses, suspenders, tools attached to any of the foregoing MUST be kept out of the deposit zone prior to and on approach. Shit on your kit just once and you'll know what I mean.

[Carcassdragger]

Oh sure. In roadways of course. A full size shovel is easy to have in the pickup when using the bumper dumper.

Elsewhere it's usually in such a remote spot, I don't bother. Of course when using the split rock technique, deposits are usually in a cavity or depression anyway. The banded rock or speckled rattlesnakes might disapprove though.

For added fun, you can always GPS your shit pile so your buddies can play geocache to find them later.

[Carcassdragger]

I consider myself an expert at shitting outdoors.

The very best places are on a hillside with a view and on two rocks with a downslope V in between so as to lift and separate the butt cheeks.

Next preferred is one flat rock on which to set one butt cheek thereby providing some separation and a resting perch.

If in the sandy desert, a good choice is the horizontal tree branch hang This technique is performed after selecting a horizontal mesquite or ironwood branch at about chest level and hanging off from it using both arms. Quite comfortable and effective.

Some years ago, I purchased a bumper dumper which is a toilet seat sttached to the male part of a receiver hitch. Just choose a spot on a remote road, preferably with a view, plug in the bumper dumper and let er go while enjoying a nice sit down.

Regarding squatting when a toilet seat is available, I'll choose sitting-regardless of the sphincter area relief-as it provides a nice respite to get some reading done.

Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?

My Brother!

All our other BDW brethren are scratching their heads right now HAR! If all the above is not instinctive in your total body muscle memory when time comes to take a dump you're not a player!

One thing I might add to round out the nuances of shitting in the woods: Before the squat you simply must account for all your accoutrement. Belts, straps, harnesses, suspenders, tools attached to any of the foregoing MUST be kept out of the deposit zone prior to and on approach. Shit on your kit just once and you'll know what I mean.

Extremely valuable and necessary contribution here.

Also, if in a remote location and you find that you've forgotten to bring a wipe roll, know that if the weather is warm, you can rip the sleeves off your shirt. This taught to me by a buddy who returned to camp after his morning walk with no shirt sleeves.

[dovecanyoncat]

Regarding squatting when a toilet seat is available, I'll choose sitting-regardless of the sphincter area relief-as it provides a nice respite to get some reading done.

Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?

When my wife was along she would read while I did plots. If she read aloud I needed her to omit reading out numbers as it fucked up my ability to keep a number series in my head before entering them into the data recorder. But there was a wonderful protracted moment of freedom when taking a dump and she could freely read to me.

It's the little things.

Once a hunter came up on us in desperate need to understand why he heard someone reciting text out in the woods. I wasn't in the crouch at that moment. That would have been special.

[dovecanyoncat]

I consider myself an expert at shitting outdoors.

The very best places are on a hillside with a view and on two rocks with a downslope V in between so as to lift and separate the butt cheeks.

Next preferred is one flat rock on which to set one butt cheek thereby providing some separation and a resting perch.

If in the sandy desert, a good choice is the horizontal tree branch hang This technique is performed after selecting a horizontal mesquite or ironwood branch at about chest level and hanging off from it using both arms. Quite comfortable and effective.

Some years ago, I purchased a bumper dumper which is a toilet seat sttached to the male part of a receiver hitch. Just choose a spot on a remote road, preferably with a view, plug in the bumper dumper and let er go while enjoying a nice sit down.

Regarding squatting when a toilet seat is available, I'll choose sitting-regardless of the sphincter area relief-as it provides a nice respite to get some reading done.

Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?

My Brother!

All our other BDW brethren are scratching their heads right now HAR! If all the above is not instinctive in your total body muscle memory when time comes to take a dump you're not a player!

One thing I might add to round out the nuances of shitting in the woods: Before the squat you simply must account for all your accoutrement. Belts, straps, harnesses, suspenders, tools attached to any of the foregoing MUST be kept out of the deposit zone prior to and on approach. Shit on your kit just once and you'll know what I mean.

Extremely valuable and necessary contribution here.

Also, if in a remote location and you find that you've forgotten to bring a wipe roll, know that if the weather is warm, you can rip the sleeves off your shirt. This taught to me by a buddy who returned to camp after his morning walk with no shirt sleeves.

If you're really tidy, the pocket of a tee shirt will suffice. On my 1970s geo-physical crew all of us had tees with the pocket missing.

[Carcassdragger]

ANOTHER stellar BDW thread!

[Merkin]

Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?

I was an at work shitter when I was working. However, the biggest complaint was the industrial grade TP used. Single ply and sandpaper rough. At least they didn't have to worry about anyone stealing it during the TP shortage.

At home I am a 100% Charmin Ultra Soft guy.

If you're really tidy, the pocket of a tee shirt will suffice. On my 1970s geo-physical crew all of us had tees with the pocket missing.

Not sure how far remote is remote, but I used to use tree leaves. Just like our frickin' ancestors.

Although dad used old Sears catalogs in the outhouse.

[dovecanyoncat]

Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?

At home I am a 100% Charmin Ultra Soft guy.

If you're really tidy, the pocket of a tee shirt will suffice. On my 1970s geo-physical crew all of us had tees with the pocket missing.

Not sure how far remote is remote, but I used to use tree leaves. Just like our frickin' ancestors.

Mullein: all over the Rocky Mountain mixed conifer zone, is nature's Charmin Ultra Soft. And, when the seed stalk dries up and dies in Fall you can pull it up and throw the spear at your buds. *redneck dodgeball*

[Carcassdragger]

Also, another tip. Whenever possible, always shit at work. Why not get paid while performing this essential duty?

At home I am a 100% Charmin Ultra Soft guy.

If you're really tidy, the pocket of a tee shirt will suffice. On my 1970s geo-physical crew all of us had tees with the pocket missing.

Not sure how far remote is remote, but I used to use tree leaves. Just like our frickin' ancestors.

Mullein: all over the Rocky Mountain mixed conifer zone, is nature's Charmin Ultra Soft. And, when the seed stalk dries up and dies in Fall you can pull it up and throw the spear at your buds. *redneck dodgeball*

Invasive. I've expended a bit of resources to keep it at reasonable levels. I knew that, after introduction, it was used for quite a bit of medicinal purposes. Now I know of an essential use.

Had one botanist tell me that, even though it's invasive, it's thought by many to not be an overall detriment to habitat? Guess I should do more reading.

Sheesh. I tell ya, the things I've learned here.

[dovecanyoncat]

I know, right? Who says we're just sportsball dullards?

[azgreg]

The Krapp Strapp.

[Merkin]

[dovecanyoncat]

Exactly like the shitter at my family's place near Polebridge, homesteaded in the 20s. I emptied that honeypot with posthole diggers and a wheelbarrow. Chores like that are the only real reasons to have kids, if ya ask me.

[Alieberman]

Glad this thread has risen from the dead

Question for the old long time married men-

Does anyone shit in the presence of their significant other? I know some people are ok with this… no judgement from me.

Wife and I pee freely in front of one another… but the door is always closed for more than that!

[84Cat]

We have no problem shitting in the presence of the other although we don't linger either

[dovecanyoncat]

Oh hell, even in our 2 bathroom townhome my wife comes in to rob the roll while I'm droppin' heat!

We once remodeled a living space that incorporated the toilet into the entire open-air bedroom without separation of any kind. Freaked out guests as it was a one bedroom/bathroom + living room/dining room deal.

Also, decades ago she asked me always to sit down to do my business. The habit stuck, and besides, as married men don't we all go to the throne for solitude and to read and to troll the web/BDW and to ponder the mysteries of life, so why not sit down? Urinals are only for away games.

[Siempre Verde]

Lol. Love this thread! When you gotta go, you gotta go. No lie, I had the best poo of my life just off the side of the Finger Rock trail. It was out of the blue, but I had TP in my backpack. As an off-roader and hiker, I’ve always got more water than I need, a map, some kind of food, and … TP.

Having grown up on a farm, doing that thing in nature isn’t an issue.

[Carcassdragger]

I'm sitting right now.

[Carcassdragger]

I'm sitting right now.

While pondering the intelligent and articulate musings on BDW, it's interesting to note that all of your thoughts here regularly help with stimulating movement.

Keep the shit flowing guys and gals.

[UAEebs86]

Over or under? Surprisingly, there actually is a 'correct' way to hang a toilet paper roll.

Let's settle this silly-but-surprisingly-heated debate once and for all.

https://www.upworthy.com/over-or-under- ... paper-roll

[pc in NM]

Over or under? Surprisingly, there actually is a 'correct' way to hang a toilet paper roll.

Let's settle this silly-but-surprisingly-heated debate once and for all.

https://www.upworthy.com/over-or-under- ... paper-roll

Fukin' experts apparently never owned a cat...