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The Fart Thread

Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2017 4:31 am
by PieceOfMeat
Does this thread already exist? I didn't find it when searching. If it does exist someone point me to it and I'll delete this thread. thanks.

Anyhow.

Farting.

Everybody does it.

For example. I just farted. it was the kind of fart that, upon smelling, makes one wonder if a doctor visit might be needed.

It actually quite felt good to release it. I thought it was going to be a small fart and instead was quite long and gaseous. Not loud though, instead it was only mildly disturbing to the ear.

Then the smell wafted up to my nostrils and, well, I'm not going to lie here, I had to turn on a nearby fan to air out the space and save me from nasal misery.

Re: The Fart Thread

Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2017 4:33 am
by PieceOfMeat
Also, did anyone grow up with parents/adults who made up interesting alternative descriptions/words for farts?

I remember an uncle who called them "poop chute toots" and would often shorten it to just "chute toot". E.g. "Woah, that was certainly a loud chute toot wasn't it!"

Re: The Fart Thread

Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2017 6:08 am
by RichardCranium
Turns Out We've Been Listening To A Backstreet Boy's Fart This Whole Time

Yeah, well, not me actually, but some of you might know somebody who has been.

Re: The Fart Thread

Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2017 7:50 am
by Longhorned
Donald Trump is our first "I'm going to keep releasing and make everyone on this airplane stew in it because only I matter" president.

Re: The Fart Thread

Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2017 8:14 am
by azcat49
Must be some interesting statistics on how much human gas is expelled each day globally and what is the impact of that not to mention all of the animals.

Re: The Fart Thread

Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2017 9:08 am
by beames
With a potty-training two year old I've actually been grappling with this topic lately. I've been undecided on exactly how crass the word "fart" really is. Because I'd rather my daughter walk around telling strangers (and mother in law) that she has to "toot" when the inevitable happens, I find myself having to censor myself in uncertainty. Still the "fart" slips out from time to time as they are known to do! Anyway, just last night while reading a book about snakes to said daughter, I discovered yet another example of nature's majesty that made me feel a little better about the whole situation...

https://youtu.be/BD2StXY1qKg" target="_blank

Turns out defensive farting is common in the snake world, and I could never respect a biologist that labeled what a snake does as simply tooting. Tooting is what Mary Poppins does, not a king freaking cobra!

Re: The Fart Thread

Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2017 1:28 pm
by azgreg
Image

Re: The Fart Thread

Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2017 7:24 pm
by Longhorned
One team of scientists now argues that the Strangled Balloon Animal fart doesn't exist.

Re: The Fart Thread

Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2017 9:56 pm
by RichardCranium
I've never heard of the 'Swamp Ninja' but it kinda sounds like they needed a new name for the 'Silent But Deadly' for some reason.