Kids

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Tue Jun 15, 2021 9:54 pm

Maybe I'm naive, maybe I'm just excited, and somewhat terrified...but shit I can't wait to meet my daughter. 50ish days and counting.

Alieberman · Post by **Alieberman** » Tue Jun 15, 2021 9:56 pm

Something's wrong if you don't feel all of those emotions. It's a roller coaster!

Just get your sleep now!

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Tue Jun 15, 2021 10:18 pm

That I am doing unless my wife is working her overnight shifts at the hospital, which is only 2 nights a week right now thankfully. So 2 nights a week I sleep about 3-4 hours and 5 nights a week I sleep about 9 hours.

I can't describe how thankful I am in this shit hole country we live in that I have an employer that will allow me 2 months off with my daughter and wife after she's born with 100% pay. I'm so incredibly privileged and lucky.

One of my closest friends only got about 1.5 weeks off (mostly unpaid) when his son was born 3 months ago. He's not doing well with that.

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 7:27 am

Watch the movie Parenthood with Steve Martin regarding it being a roller coaster.

You never stop worrying about your kids.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 9:59 am

What about when they're married and have their own backyard grill and stuff like that?

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 9:59 am

Kids are over-rated.

EastCoastCat · Post by **EastCoastCat** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 11:55 am

I was lounging in my pool last weekend and my son came out and handed me a perfectly made margarita.

They eventually come in handy.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 12:00 pm

My two have been off the payroll about a year now. It's a beautiful thing.

Alieberman · Post by **Alieberman** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 12:05 pm

I remember celebrating when we no longer had to pay for daycare.... now we have 2 years remaining until the oldest goes to college...

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 12:10 pm

Man I'll be 53 when this kid graduates high school. Long way to go!

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 12:10 pm

Just don’t get them wet or feed them after midnight and you should be fine.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 6:22 pm

Remember, after the birth you're supposed to have professional black and white photos of you with the baby while you're shirtless. Nobody knows why, but this isn't optional.

ASUHATER! · Post by **ASUHATER!** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 6:37 pm

I'd pay to see said photos and I'm in the family

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 6:56 pm

Longhorned wrote: ↑Wed Jun 16, 2021 6:22 pm Remember, after the birth you're supposed to have professional black and white photos of you with the baby while you're shirtless. Nobody knows why, but this isn't optional.

Thankfully my wife audibly gags at the very idea of this so I won't be subjected to it.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 7:21 pm

Longhorned wrote: ↑Wed Jun 16, 2021 6:22 pm Remember, after the birth you're supposed to have professional black and white photos of you with the baby while you're shirtless. Nobody knows why, but this isn't optional.

I will admit I was talked into doing something similar when the wife was pregnant with our first.

I don’t know why it happened. I don’t know why I didn’t laugh in the photographer’s face. Probably had to do with not upsetting a pregnant woman but holy shit it’s embarrassing.

97cats · Post by **97cats** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 7:29 pm

daughter turns 14 tomorrow - born on Father’s Day 14 years ago.

the best Father’s Day gift I’ve ever received and I get it again and again every year.

having kids is the greatest thing I’ve ever done, by a mile.

my son is ok too….

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 7:41 pm

I'm actually getting two more kids of the in-law variety, as both my kids are engaged as of last Saturday. My daughter to a Brit who is caught up in the visa/Covid mess (been engaged 18 months). My son proposed to his girlfriend by the Lincoln Memorial / reflecting pool Saturday evening and she said yes.

I guess my wife and I bickering didn't scare them off LOL.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 8:00 pm

ASUHATER! · Post by **ASUHATER!** » Wed Jun 16, 2021 8:06 pm

It is. Between there being little to no parental leave for most people and stagnating wages and being saddled with student debt and housing being completely unaffordable, it just is impossible to even consider having kids for a lot of people when they can barely keep up with their own rent and electric bills. I in general don't really think I want kids, but the world working as it is and expense wise, I am sure I will never have any. Just isn't feasible to have them financially.

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 12:14 pm

At Banner currently with my wife. We're about 4 hours into our scheduled, elective induction. So far I'm holding it together but nothing has really happened yet...

Alieberman · Post by **Alieberman** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 12:23 pm

Part 2 of your life is about to begin....

Hope everything goes smoothly!

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 12:31 pm

Bear Down Mrs. SD86!

DrWildcat · Post by **DrWildcat** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 12:43 pm

Good luck to you and your wife!

97cats · Post by **97cats** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:19 pm

August baby - congrats

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:21 pm

Enjoy the best years of your life!

Alieberman · Post by **Alieberman** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:41 pm

97cats wrote: ↑Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:19 pm August baby - congrats

Is there something special about August babies? (my youngest turns 14 later this month)

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:51 pm

My wife's family has a ton of August birthdays too. She turned 29 two days ago, 7/31.

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:58 pm

So Thanksgiving celebrations leading to baby making?

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 2:18 pm

Alieberman wrote: ↑Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:41 pm
97cats wrote: ↑Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:19 pm August baby - congrats
Is there something special about August babies? (my youngest turns 14 later this month)

Besides that 97cats was an August baby? I don’t think so.

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 3:12 pm

Good luck. Say goodbye to sleep for a while.

EastCoastCat · Post by **EastCoastCat** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 3:24 pm

Jump in. The water is warm.

97cats · Post by **97cats** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 3:51 pm

Chicat wrote: ↑Mon Aug 02, 2021 2:18 pm
Alieberman wrote: ↑Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:41 pm
97cats wrote: ↑Mon Aug 02, 2021 1:19 pm August baby - congrats
Is there something special about August babies? (my youngest turns 14 later this month)
Besides that 97cats was an August baby? I don’t think so.

HEY!

lmao but as usual, Chi is right.

although Tom Brady, Magic Johnson, Mike Trout, Pete Sampras, Rod Laver, Usain Bolt, Kobe Bryant, Deion Sanders, Edwin Moses, Wilt Chamberlain, Ted Williams, Roberto Clemente.....................and, Tim Tebow!

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 4:18 pm

There's over 7 billion people on teh planet and only 365 days in a year. There's going to be some overlap.

wyo-cat · Post by **wyo-cat** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 7:43 pm

ASUHATER! wrote: ↑Wed Jun 16, 2021 8:06 pm It is. Between there being little to no parental leave for most people and stagnating wages and being saddled with student debt and housing being completely unaffordable, it just is impossible to even consider having kids for a lot of people when they can barely keep up with their own rent and electric bills. I in general don't really think I want kids, but the world working as it is and expense wise, I am sure I will never have any. Just isn't feasible to have them financially.

When our kids were born we didn’t get shit from the U of A. Almost went broke, actually.

Now their parental leave is huge.

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Mon Aug 02, 2021 9:21 pm

It's also about 3 times as expensive to raise a family and have a "middle class" life now compared to 40 years ago.

Merkin · Post by **Merkin** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 8:12 am

wyo-cat wrote: ↑Mon Aug 02, 2021 7:43 pm
ASUHATER! wrote: ↑Wed Jun 16, 2021 8:06 pm It is. Between there being little to no parental leave for most people and stagnating wages and being saddled with student debt and housing being completely unaffordable, it just is impossible to even consider having kids for a lot of people when they can barely keep up with their own rent and electric bills. I in general don't really think I want kids, but the world working as it is and expense wise, I am sure I will never have any. Just isn't feasible to have them financially.
When our kids were born we didn’t get shit from the U of A. Almost went broke, actually.

Now their parental leave is huge.

Not sure how long the UA gives, but the CSU (incl Cal Poly) now gives parents 6 weeks off with pay and you don't need to take it immediately, you can stagger the days with your partner.

When my kids were born, they had nothing, I only took one week of family sick leave for each one. I have never been so tired in my life.

I want that time back, retroactive!

gronk4heisman · Post by **gronk4heisman** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 8:25 am

I was working in the delivery room. Word of advice, never be an executive at a small business (especially with a crazy owner). With my second child at a new company they did not offer paternity leave until a month after he was born. I think companies, for no selfish reasons at all, should retroactively give paternity time to those who had children before it was a thing.

Alieberman · Post by **Alieberman** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 8:45 am

Merkin wrote: ↑Tue Aug 03, 2021 8:12 am
wyo-cat wrote: ↑Mon Aug 02, 2021 7:43 pm
ASUHATER! wrote: ↑Wed Jun 16, 2021 8:06 pm It is. Between there being little to no parental leave for most people and stagnating wages and being saddled with student debt and housing being completely unaffordable, it just is impossible to even consider having kids for a lot of people when they can barely keep up with their own rent and electric bills. I in general don't really think I want kids, but the world working as it is and expense wise, I am sure I will never have any. Just isn't feasible to have them financially.
When our kids were born we didn’t get shit from the U of A. Almost went broke, actually.

Now their parental leave is huge.
Not sure how long the UA gives, but the CSU (incl Cal Poly) now gives parents 6 weeks off with pay and you don't need to take it immediately, you can stagger the days with your partner.

When my kids were born, they had nothing, I only took one week of family sick leave for each one. I have never been so tired in my life.

I want that time back, retroactive!

The UofA is the same. After our 1st was born, my wife was able to stretch her leave out and keep our son out of any type of outside care between her leave, me taking time off and my mom coming down from phx from time to time.

wyo-cat · Post by **wyo-cat** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 8:49 am

Merkin wrote: ↑Tue Aug 03, 2021 8:12 am
wyo-cat wrote: ↑Mon Aug 02, 2021 7:43 pm
ASUHATER! wrote: ↑Wed Jun 16, 2021 8:06 pm It is. Between there being little to no parental leave for most people and stagnating wages and being saddled with student debt and housing being completely unaffordable, it just is impossible to even consider having kids for a lot of people when they can barely keep up with their own rent and electric bills. I in general don't really think I want kids, but the world working as it is and expense wise, I am sure I will never have any. Just isn't feasible to have them financially.
When our kids were born we didn’t get shit from the U of A. Almost went broke, actually.

Now their parental leave is huge.
Not sure how long the UA gives, but the CSU (incl Cal Poly) now gives parents 6 weeks off with pay and you don't need to take it immediately, you can stagger the days with your partner.

When my kids were born, they had nothing, I only took one week of family sick leave for each one. I have never been so tired in my life.

I want that time back, retroactive!

Same for either parent. We got zero in 2001 and 2003 she(u of a employee) made about $20k more than I, so 12 weeks with no benefit was hard. She was only 2 years in, so there was no big Vacation balance.

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 9:14 am

Imagine living in a civilized country where you can take 6 months off to be with your child when it needs you the most.

My wife saved up vacation time to add to the 6 weeks she got off for Maternity leave. Our son was born two weeks early and her HR Dept. said sorry, you go on FMLA now and your vacation is forfeited and we’ll see you back here in 6 weeks. He was born right before Christmas and they had given everyone the week between Christmas and New Years off. Did that add another week to her leave? Nope!

Going back to work after only six weeks with a newborn was probably one of the hardest things she’s ever done. I got two weeks Paternity leave which I took when she went back to work, but being in sales it was expected that I would still work and actually got reprimanded by my boss for not being “more available”. Uhh… I was taking care of a goddamn 6 week old baby!

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 12:57 pm

As of 9:18 this morning I officially became a dad. My wife was a god damn warrior. Beast mode. I'm so proud and more in love with her and my daughter than I could ever imagine. Best day of my life.

ASUHATER! · Post by **ASUHATER!** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 1:01 pm

Can confirm that little SD86 is the cutest baby ever and it's a great day, I'm very happy to be an uncle and very proud of my brother and his wife

84Cat · Post by **84Cat** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 1:07 pm

Congrats SD86 & family! Enjoy the ride!

azgreg · Post by **azgreg** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 1:09 pm

scumdevils86 wrote: ↑Tue Aug 03, 2021 12:57 pm As of 9:18 this morning I officially became a dad. My wife was a god damn warrior. Beast mode. I'm so proud and more in love with her and my daughter than I could ever imagine. Best day of my life.

UAEebs86 · Post by **UAEebs86** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 1:10 pm

Congrats!

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 1:10 pm

Congrats Andrew! Seems like just yesterday you were a kid yourself.

Alieberman · Post by **Alieberman** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 1:12 pm

Congrats to you and your wife... and proud Uncle!

scumdevils86 · Post by **scumdevils86** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 2:23 pm

Chicat wrote: ↑Tue Aug 03, 2021 1:10 pm Congrats Andrew! Seems like just yesterday you were a kid yourself.

Who are we kidding, we're all faking this grown up shit!

Chicat · Post by **Chicat** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 2:49 pm

scumdevils86 wrote: ↑Tue Aug 03, 2021 2:23 pm
Chicat wrote: ↑Tue Aug 03, 2021 1:10 pm Congrats Andrew! Seems like just yesterday you were a kid yourself.
Who are we kidding, we're all faking this grown up shit!

Ain’t that the truth.

Which brings up a nice reminder. People are going to come out of the woodwork with advice on what to do with your kid to get them to sleep, eat, and everything else under the sun.

You should listen to everything they say.

BUT……

This is your kid. Not their’s. Whatever you do has to work for all three of you. And honestly, you’ll all settle into a rhythm eventually and everything will work out great. So don’t sweat it if your Aunt Martha clucks her tongue and shakes her head because you give the kid a pacifier or let her sleep three hours. If that old battleaxe wants to come stay up all night while your kid screams her head off, she’s more than welcome to drag her fat ass over and put her money where her mouth is.

Longhorned · Post by **Longhorned** » Tue Aug 03, 2021 7:48 pm

Congratulations!

I do have advice. If your family offers to help... and then indeed you get really tired and need a break... and you bring up that help offer and they're all "kittens? what kittens?", say "listen mofos you goddam offered so watch this baby so I can go to the fucking supermarket and buy some goddam Folgers you insolent assholes!!!"

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