Hot/Not Pick-em: The Elites

[JMarkJohns]

So, since we can't bet, I thought this might be cool.

Call your final bracket in this thread.

Any poster 100% correct gets to handpick his favorite hottie from the runner-up field to automatically make next year's dance.

Polls will be created on Saturday. I will lock this thread prior to poll creation.

1. Kate Upton vs. 8. Alyssa Milano
4/ Charlize Theron vs. 5. Salma Hayek

3. Elisha Cuthbert vs. 6. Emmanuelle Chriqui
2. Jessica Alba vs. 7. Kate Beckinsale

Follow my example in the next post if you have any confusion.

[JMarkJohns]

This is far more difficult to do than it appears.

Upton V Milano: Seemed many figured Upton would lose early, but here she it. She's won pretty handedly as well. But Milano has her supporters. She ranked highly initially, and survived the toughest Sweet 16 matchup in a comeback victory over Welch.

Theron V Hayek: Theron seems poised to win this, as she's smoked the competition thus far, but she might have a 2009 Louisville failure just on the horizon, as there's a movement for Hayek, and she's a force in her own right.

Cuthbert V Chriqui: Probably the hardest matchup to gauge. Two relative newbies, though each has their rabid factions of support. This one is literally a toss up. Almost impossible to get a read on who might hold an advantage based upon previous rounds.

Alba V Beckinsale: Alba was likely a co-favorite entering, but she's looked a bit more vulnerable than expected. She didn't dominate Liz Hurley the way I thought, leading me to think her support isn't as dynamic as once thought. Beckinsale, however, turned a squeaker at the half into a rout. Seems to have momentum.


1. Kate Upton - Upton
vs
8. Alyssa Milano

4. Charlize Theron - Theron
vs
5. Salma Hayek


3. Elisha Cuthbert - Cuthbert
vs
6. Emmanuelle Chriqui

2. Jessica Alba
vs
7. Kate Beckinsale - Beckinsale

TITLE GAME: Theron vs. Beckinsale

CHAMPION: #4 Charlize Theron

[Chicat]

1. Kate Upton vs. 8. Alyssa Milano
4. Charlize Theron vs. 5. Salma Hayek

3. Elisha Cuthbert vs. 6. Emmanuel Chriqui - Elisha Cuthbert - Elisha Cuthbert
2. Jessica Alba vs. 7. Kate Beckinsale- Kate Beckinsale

1. Kate Upton vs. 4. Charlize Theron
3. Elisha Cuthbert vs. 7. Kate Beckinsale

4. Charlize Theron takes the crown

[Alieberman]

1. Kate Upton - Upton
vs
8. Alyssa Milano

4. Charlize Theron - Theron
vs
5. Salma Hayek


3. Elisha Cuthbert - Chriqui
vs
6. Emmanuel Chriqui

2. Jessica Alba
vs
7. Kate Beckinsale - Alba

TITLE GAME: Theron vs. Chriqui

CHAMPION: #4 Charlize Theron

[PieceOfMeat]

Straight chalk in the first matchups
Upton
Theron
Cuthbert
Alba


But then, an upset!
Theron
Alba

And the champ is the #4 seed, Theron!

(apparently all of us so far have Theron winning it, interesting)

[Puerco]

1. Kate Upton - Upton
vs
8. Alyssa Milano

4. Charlize Theron - Hayek
vs
5. Salma Hayek


3. Elisha Cuthbert - Cuthbert
vs
6. Emmanuelle Chriqui

2. Jessica Alba
vs
7. Kate Beckinsale - Alba

TITLE GAME: Hayek vs. Alba
CHAMPION: Salma Hayek

[Merkin]

Round 1 winners:

Kate Upton
Salma Hayek

Elisha Cuthbert
Jessica Alba

Round 2 winners:

Salma Hayek
Jessica Alba

Winner:

Salma Hayek



I think Theron is the prettiest, but Salma is just so smoking hot.

[azgreg]

1. Kate Upton vs. 8. Alyssa Milano
4. Charlize Theron vs. 5. Salma Hayek

3. Elisha Cuthbert vs. 6. Emmanuelle Chriqui
2. Jessica Alba vs. 7. Kate Beckinsale


4. Charlize Theron vs 8. Alyssa Milano
2. Jessica Alba vs 3. Elisha Cuthbert


2. Jessica Alba vs 4. Charlize Theron

Tie breaker: 30 boners

[the real dill]

Charlotte McKinney is the hottest, but I think she was omitted to make the competition fair.

[JMarkJohns]

Charlotte McKinney is the hottest, but I think she was omitted to make the competition fair.

She's a model only. Upton has at least been in a few films. Same with Crawford.

[Reydituto]

So, since we can't bet, I thought this might be cool.

1. Kate Upton vs. 8. Alyssa Milano
4. Charlize Theron vs. 5. Salma Hayek

3. Elisha Cuthbert vs. 6. Emmanuelle Chriqui
2. Jessica Alba vs. 7. Kate Beckinsale

Who says we can't bet? Why, the House of Rey is setting odds for these matchups, and although HoR is not accepting any action, feel free to wager amongst yourselves (not actual money of course, these are just for entertainment purposes).

After an exhaustive analysis of the brackets and the voting trends over the last 2 months (F*ck Nate Silver), here are the odds for the matchups above, the number representing the number of votes the favorite is favored by (or how many votes the underdog should get at the start to make it even):

(1) Kate Upton PICK'EM (8) Alyssa Milano
(4) Charlize Theron -8 (5) Salma Hayek
(3) Elisha Cuthbert -11.5 (6) Emmanuelle Chriqui
(2) Jessica Alba -9 (7) Kate Beckinsale

Let's break it down, Dr. Jack Ramsey-style ...

(1) Kate Upton PICK'EM (8) Alyssa Milano

By far the most difficult matchup to handicap. Certainly the most polarizing figure in the bracket, #1 overall seed Kate Upton has been an upset candidate since the First Round, and has the lowest average winning margin among the Elite Eight (winning by an average of 6.67 votes). People keep wanting her to lose, starting with criminally underseeded Sharon Stone in the First Round, but all she does is win, win, win, and not even those goofy "Game of War" ads or Verlander's schwantz has been able to slow her roll into the Elite Eight. Meanwhile, Alyssa "Pepperidge Farm" Milano has a devoted following, second hand rumors of sexual ferocity, prepubescent staying power since the 1980's, plus the "Cavewoman" pelt of Raquel Welch on her wall in the game of the tournament so far, and what many considered an upset, seeding be damned. Can she be the one that sends the "Kentucky" of this bracket home? Win or lose, the people are guaranteed to come out in droves to vote, as Upton's prior three rounds have had the highest cumulative voter turnout. Clearly the highest "upset" potential, I think this one's closer than anyone would have thought going into the tournament.

(4) Charlize Theron -8 (5) Salma Hayek

This spread seems low to me. As the tournament wore on, Ms. Theron has emerged as not only the darling of the tournament, but what many think is the current favorite to win it all. Her Sweet 16 match-up against an underseeded #20 Jennifer Connolly was the only time she's been challenged, yet she won that comfortably 33-21, and has the 2nd-highest scoring margin so far at +26.7. Salma and her flotation devices have been advancing steadily, and one has to be impressed by Hayek sending home ScarJo and HalleBerry (one word), but her performance metrics are skewed by her First Round 42-3 blowout over a smiling, Almost Famous Kate Hudson. Although Salma has her verdant fans here, and Sean Penn might be a deadweight distraction, Theron will be too much to handle (as she is for most men or women) on her march to the Final Four. Some think this should actually be a Final Four or Championship matchup, but I'll think Salma Hayek is the most overseeded gal in the Elite Eight.

(3) Elisha Cuthbert -11.5 (6) Emmanuelle Chriqui

Elisha Cuthbert has just been crushing fools all tournament long, and while some would say she's benefited from a fortunate draw (Jennifer Aniston and Eva Mendes were the lower possible seeds in each round), there is no denying her tournament leading +32.3 voting margin and 40.0 votes per game scoring average. Emmanuelle However-You-Say-Her-Last-Name has certainly earned her spot in the Elite Eight, sending perennial hotties Emma Stone, Shania Twain and Allison Brie home in succession by an average of 21.7 votes, but I tend to think she's maxed out and happy to be here. So who continues their hot run into the Final Four, Jack Bauer's Daughter, or E's Girlfriend? Ima gonna go with the Girl Next Door.

(2) Jessica Alba -9 (7) Kate Beckinsale

The metrics were all over the place on this one, as Alba has an voting margin edge of 15 votes per contest over Beckinsale, but more people come out to vote in Beckinsale matchups than any other of the Elite Eight except for Charlize Theron, while Alba's contests have average the least vote totals (43.0 per game, compared to 49.0 per game for Beckinsale). Maybe people don't come out to vote for Alba because they figure she'd going to win anyway, matchups with pleasantly milquetoast Kate Mara and Isla Fisher failing to stir the loins. Beckinsale is quite formidable, doubling up on Nude Katniss in the First Round 28-14 before surviving a Second Round scare against upstart Alexandra Daddario, then rebounding against Grandpa F*cker Cat Zeta in the Sweet 16. Plus, that accent is deadly. But this isn't vampires she's battling, it's the girl that made some people believe Dane Cook was likeable, became Mrs. Machete and who was the only virtuous thing in Sin City. I think Alba cruises here.


So I think it goes as follows:

FINAL FOUR
Upton - There are at least two reasons she's the #1 overall seed.
Theron - IMO the best team playing right now.
Cuthbert - Quintessential blonde ambition wins out over vaguely ethnic mystique.
Alba - Straddles that cute/hot divide perfectly.

BDW CHAMPIONSHIP
Theron over Cuthbert in a close final. NYCat will claim racism.

[Alieberman]

Bravo Rey!!!

[Longhorned]

Thanks, Rey, now I'm PUMPED!!!

[azcat49]

Upton
Theron
Cuthbert
Alba


Theron
Cuthbert

Cuthbert

[wyo-cat]

Tidy breakdown, Rey. I bow to you - truly the King of Hot or Not!

[Merkin]

[wyo-cat]

Classic, Merk!!

[ANGCatFan]

(1) Kate Upton PICK'EM (8) Alyssa Milano
(4) Charlize Theron -8 (5) Salma Hayek
(3) Elisha Cuthbert -11.5 (6) Emmanuelle Chriqui
(2) Jessica Alba -9 (7) Kate Beckinsale

Rey, damn it, you made me care about this.

So, I think Upton is the easiest call. This shouldn't be a pickem. Even Rey makes mistakes.

Now, I like all the favorites straight up, but I think the three under dolls will beat Rey's spread. Just not sure on how to cash in on that knowledge.

[azcat49]

Hard to call the lower seeds dogs I think they all cover except maybe Milano

[JMarkJohns]

Rey, show off

The rest of you, get your pick in, especially if you have a Round of 32 or lower loser who you think deserves another shot.

I'm looking at all you Marceau, Daddario, Sharapova fans...

[JMarkJohns]

I'm posting polls on Monday. As was said before transcendence, you will want to participate if you've voted ever at all. You get this right, and you can right a wrong of a previous vote in one fell naming. New year, new bracket, and the possibility of a new draw and your selection which fell short this year may have an Elite run next.

[JMarkJohns]

So nobody else gives a crap? You have about 15 hours to make picks.

[Bear Down Vegas]

1. Kate Upton vs. 8. Alyssa Milano
4. Charlize Theron vs. 5. Salma Hayek

3. Elisha Cuthbert vs. 6. Emmanuelle Chriqui
2. Jessica Alba vs. 7. Kate Beckinsale

(1) Kate Upton PICK'EM (8) Alyssa Milano
(4) Charlize Theron -8 (5) Salma Hayek
(3) Elisha Cuthbert -11.5 (6) Emmanuelle Chriqui
(2) Jessica Alba -9 (7) Kate Beckinsale

Holy Wow Rey - that was incredible!

I'm betting with my heart instead of my head because that's the way true gambling is done dammit.

Milano
Theron
Chriqui
Alba

Milano over Alba by 1 (perhaps a late switched vote?)

[JMarkJohns]

Soon

[77HoyaCat4Ever]

Theron - Hayek match-up is brutal. Two of my all time faves

[Chicat]

1. Kate Upton vs. 8. Alyssa Milano
4. Charlize Theron vs. 5. Salma Hayek

3. Elisha Cuthbert vs. 6. Emmanuel Chriqui - Elisha Cuthbert - Elisha Cuthbert
2. Jessica Alba vs. 7. Kate Beckinsale- Kate Beckinsale

1. Kate Upton vs. 4. Charlize Theron
3. Elisha Cuthbert vs. 7. Kate Beckinsale

4. Charlize Theron takes the crown

I didn't do too bad...