Thanksgiving is a farce. A wondrous, many-splendored, mysterious, and lovely farce, but a farce nonetheless. And since it’s the season for gratefulness, I’ll tell you one major thing I’m grateful for: the food at every single other holiday besides Thanksgiving. Sometimes the truth hurts. And the truth is that every other major American holiday celebration has better food than Thanksgiving Day.
Lady, you are the new Jon Snow. . . you know NOTHING.
(Srsly folks. . .my sister could own ALL of your souls with her turkey gravy.)
I personally enjoy Thanksgiving food (but probably only because I eat it literally once per year and I shove to the back of my mind the fact that we're celebrating a milestone in the eventually slaughter and persecution of millions of indigenous peoples of the americas) and I have pretty set traditions for the holiday.
Depending on how many we're feeding, we either do a duck or a goose for Thanksgiving, with all the other usual dishes. It's a completely traditional Thanksgiving, but damn, why does this turkey taste so amazing?
The funny thing to me is that the turkey is easily always the worst thing on the menu (except the sweet potatoes, but that's just a personal choice). The skin is great, but the meat is pretty dry and somewhat flavorless. All the rest of the menu is the tits, but the centerpiece is always kind of a disappointment.
Of the 12 coaches, Rush picked the one whose fans have the deepest passion, the longest memories, the greatest lung capacity and … did I mention deep passion?
I don't cook anything. You have to go where the family goes . . . even when the person hosting actually wants no part of it and hosts out of some sense of obligation and tradition and just throws the turkey into the oven for 14 hours and prays the whole time that people will eat and be gone as quickly as possible so they can get down to the business of enjoying their weekend.
The person who usually hosts won't be doing it next year, so my sincere hope is that we do it at home for immediate family only. And I'm going to lobby for Cornish Game Hens. Fuck turkey.
Of the 12 coaches, Rush picked the one whose fans have the deepest passion, the longest memories, the greatest lung capacity and … did I mention deep passion?
Of the 12 coaches, Rush picked the one whose fans have the deepest passion, the longest memories, the greatest lung capacity and … did I mention deep passion?
Chicat wrote:The funny thing to me is that the turkey is easily always the worst thing on the menu (except the sweet potatoes, but that's just a personal choice). The skin is great, but the meat is pretty dry and somewhat flavorless. All the rest of the menu is the tits, but the centerpiece is always kind of a disappointment.
UAEebs86 wrote:Is this the turkey at your in-laws Chi?
Looks a little too juicy for their tastes...
Of the 12 coaches, Rush picked the one whose fans have the deepest passion, the longest memories, the greatest lung capacity and … did I mention deep passion?
African American Thanksgiving includes macaroni and cheese and collard greens, which in my opinion have no place on a Thanksgiving table because they're so amazing that I want to focus on them at the expense of everything else. That's why I like to follow up a couple days later with a separate meal of just macaroni and cheese and collard greens.
“If you have the choice between humble and cocky, go with cocky. There's always time to be humble later, once you've been proven horrendously, irrevocably wrong.”
Ya gotta brine it first. I will put it in the brine tonight (has a ton of flavor...salt, sugar, orange peel, juniper berries, allspice, candied ginger, cinnamon etc) and then stuff the bird with apples, sage, rosemary, cinnamon and some broth. Tons of flavor, juicy as hell.
Longhorned wrote:African American Thanksgiving includes macaroni and cheese and collard greens, which in my opinion have no place on a Thanksgiving table because they're so amazing that I want to focus on them at the expense of everything else. That's why I like to follow up a couple days later with a separate meal of just macaroni and cheese and collard greens.
1. DO NOT arrive empty handed to Black Thanksgiving. Store bought isn’t great, but if you aren’t sure how Black holiday food works, it’s better than getting the church lady look when you bring candied parsnips over. See rule 2.)
2. The answer is ALWAYS sweet potatoes. Neauxp, no pumpkin, parsnips, rutabagas, butternut squash, nah-unh…sweet potatoes aka “yams.” (Not really yams)
3. As with our close cousin “Southern White Thanksgiving,” we don’t call cornbread “stuffing,” stuffing….we call it “dressing.” Calling it “stuffing,” is a dead giveaway you don’t know the quality of what you brought over. Throw that boxed stuff away.
4. Bruce Almighty (wink wink) didn’t create “yams,” De Lawd did, so buy the ones that don’t come in a can when you follow rule 2.
5. Macaroni and cheese with breadcrumbs and bechamel sauce? Really? And it’s not even “urunge?” Neauxp…. not Black Thanksgiving approved.
Best thing on the menu today? My wife's green bean casserole.
The worst? It was a tie between the turkey and the gravy . . . which really sucked because the only way to make the turkey edible usually is to drown it in gravy.
Of the 12 coaches, Rush picked the one whose fans have the deepest passion, the longest memories, the greatest lung capacity and … did I mention deep passion?
Chicat wrote:Best thing on the menu today? My wife's green bean casserole.
The worst? It was a tie between the turkey and the gravy . . . which really sucked because the only way to make the turkey edible usually is to drown it in gravy.
*basks in the glory of my sisters awesome juicy turkey and wonderful own your soul gravy*
And I'd argue the Middle East has always been screwed up. Western powers just thought they could fix it by drawing arbitrary lines on a map and telling people, "Now get along!"
Of the 12 coaches, Rush picked the one whose fans have the deepest passion, the longest memories, the greatest lung capacity and … did I mention deep passion?
Chicat wrote:And I'd argue the Middle East has always been screwed up. Western powers just thought they could fix it by drawing arbitrary lines on a map and telling people, "Now get along!"
that was the crux of the argument
ASUHATER! wrote:I'd argue the British and French collectively screwed up more after wwi
Chicat wrote:And I'd argue the Middle East has always been screwed up. Western powers just thought they could fix it by drawing arbitrary lines on a map and telling people, "Now get along!"
that was the crux of the argument
ASUHATER! wrote:I'd argue the British and French collectively screwed up more after wwi
yup, included the Russians as well.
Though about mentioning the Russians (and the Ottomans. . .) but I kinda wanted to keep this on topic (yah know. . .things like roasted sweet potatoes and bacon). Ah well.
Chicat wrote:Best thing on the menu today? My wife's green bean casserole.
The worst? It was a tie between the turkey and the gravy . . . which really sucked because the only way to make the turkey edible usually is to drown it in gravy.
Agreed. My dad smoked a turkey this year in a Weber. It actually came out really good.
