Depression and Anxiety Thread

[Chicat]

I think about deleting Facebook at least 3-5 times per week. The only thing keeping me on that wretched fucked up platform is being able to see my long distance friends’ kids grow up and the memories they serve daily of my own kids growing up.

[scumdevils86]

I look at Facebook maybe once every couple of months at most. I don't have Instagram. I have a Twitter but don't actively engage with anyone. No Snapchat. I do have a TikTok but have so far successfully engaged their algorithm so it only shows me stuff that generally brings me a chuckle. Overall, I don't engage in any content from other individuals online (except here really). It's a good thing.

[Longhorned]

Quitting Facebook is the one good thing I did BEFORE November 2016. As hard as life has been since then, it would have been harder if I were on Facebook.

When Biden became president, I stopped following all politically-oriented Twitter accounts, and I've tried my best to stop reading the Washington Post and other news. The U.S. and much of the world fell into utter shit in 2016. Why should I follow the details of that shit? When I take a crap, I wipe and flush. I don't rub it all over my body and keep myself awake with the stench.

Staying informed doesn't require close monitoring. I know where to send my money.

In newspapers, I read about sports and the arts. I've got to get to New York for the Julie Mehretu exhibition, and there's an amazing Titian exhibition in Boston I've got to see before in closes on January 2.

[dovecanyoncat]

Social media: never had it, never will.

[Merkin]

I use FB quite a bit, but had to unsubscribe from all the local news sites due to the RWNJs polluting the threads with their Trump circle jerks.

FB is a great for selling crap. Much better than Craigslist.

[Chicat]

I use FB quite a bit, but had to unsubscribe from all the local news sites due to the RWNJs polluting the threads with their Trump circle jerks.

I can’t help myself when it comes to the local news comment sections.

A) There are a ton of bots/fake accounts, which I used to report but then I realized that ZuckerFucker doesn’t want to get rid of them because then his traffic gets cut by 40-60% and he has to start giving money back to advertisers.

SOooooo…

B) I love responding to the real morons, mouth breathers, Karens/Kens, and shitstains who take Sergei’s post as gospel and run with it. It’s just so much fun to apply logic to their arguments and watch them retreat to a “you don’t love America as much as I do!” stance and then to destroy that too.

[Longhorned]

Moving away from the chest shaving thread, I'm excited to start therapy and a generic brand of Zoloft, for which I just took my first 25 mg dose.

Yesterday I caught my new primary care doctor looking down at my hands while we were talking, so I looked down and noticed the fingers of one of my hands digging and pressing between the white knuckles of a tight fist. She told me anxiety can go in a downward spiral if it's left untreated. Without realizing it, you start avoiding situations, and that gets in the way of your life.

I get that the pandemic hit me pretty hard but I also wonder if it's just something you can develop like double-barista syndrome and stuff like that.

[84Cat]

Bear down LH! I hope you can get some relief!

[dovecanyoncat]

I benefited from your post about Weil's breathing technique, and it led me to use box breathing https://quietkit.com/box-breathing/ to lower my overall anxiety and BP when I measure it. BP measurement in the Dr's office is virtually worthless in my case: not only do they yammer at you while the cuff bleats away, they violate every other protocol simply out of logistical necessity. So I have to do it at home. I tossed the arm-cuff model in favor of the wrist-cuff model because it doesn't bug me nearly as much.

At home I find my overall anxiety level falls if I do a few important things: reduce my reading of political articles that emphasize the bizarreness of the right wing in America; exercise nearly every day; get quality sleep; don't drink alcohol everyday (because it unsteadies heartrate, raises BP, and interrupts sleep).

But once basketball season begins, I'm totally fucked.

[Longhorned]

I benefited from your post about Weil's breathing technique, and it led me to use box breathing https://quietkit.com/box-breathing/ to lower my overall anxiety and BP when I measure it. BP measurement in the Dr's office is virtually worthless in my case: not only do they yammer at you while the cuff bleats away, they violate every other protocol simply out of logistical necessity. So I have to do it at home. I tossed the arm-cuff model in favor of the wrist-cuff model because it doesn't bug me nearly as much.

At home I find my overall anxiety level falls if I do a few important things: reduce my reading of political articles that emphasize the bizarreness of the right wing in America; exercise nearly every day; get quality sleep; don't drink alcohol everyday (because it unsteadies heartrate, raises BP, and interrupts sleep).

But once basketball season begins, I'm totally fucked.

I identify with all this, but I need to learn box breathing, and I need to look into thT wrist cuff. The usual method freaks me out so much that I stopped taking my pressure at home. It takes about 10 times before I'm calm enough to get a real reading.

[U.P. Zona Fan]

I have a wrist cuff also, as my BP is super high at the docs office and they keep asking you health questions while taking it.

[Longhorned]

So glad to hear I'm not the only one with that BP white coat syndrome. For me it feels like a claustrophobic thing, like I'm in the Death Star trash compactor.

[Chicat]

Wow, I’ve never experienced that. In fact, I’ve never even heard of anyone having anxiety tied to a blood pressure cuff.

Maybe it’s because my dad was a doctor so I’ve always been comfortable around medical offices, equipment, nurses and doctors.

[UAEebs86]

I don't have a problem at the Dr.'s office or at home with a cuff, but everyone of those machines you sit down at like at Walgreens or my work reads really high for me and freaks me out. Not sure how often they calibrate those things?

I've been on Lisinopril since March. My dad had high BP so it was probably just a matter of time. Losing weight used to help but not recently.

[azgreg]

I'm pretty sure my blood pressure elevated a bit during my last prostate exam.

[dovecanyoncat]

I don't have a problem at the Dr.'s office or at home with a cuff, but everyone of those machines you sit down at like at Walgreens or my work reads really high for me and freaks me out. Not sure how often they calibrate those things?

I've been on Lisinopril since March. My dad had high BP so it was probably just a matter of time. Losing weight used to help but not recently.

I finally tired of optimizing my BP and went on the smallest prescribable dose of Lisinopril a couple weeks ago. I had aimed for making it to Medicare age before needing any prescription drugs but, well fuck it. It's actually liberating to accept it. If I'm going to drink as much wine as I truly want to I'll probably need to up the dose. HAR!

[Merkin]

I just started Losartan for high blood pressure at the age of 63, after having low BP my entire life and high BP not being a problem in my family.

I blame it on not exercising like I used to when I was working*. Played basketball for decades at the rec center at lunch, then racquetball, then tennis, then power walking.

Now, nothing.

*-along with drinking more wine being retired

[dovecanyoncat]

I have a wrist cuff also, as my BP is super high at the docs office and they keep asking you health questions while taking it.

Check out the protocols for taking your own BP and see if they're followed in the Doc's office ..... NOT! Then if you insist on them being followed it's as calming as reprimanding some bedraggled employee in a hotel setting about enforcing a posted mask requirement amongst a lobby full of shiteaters. It does wonders for my mood and serenity. Honestly, I prefer the prostate exam.

[84Cat]

Are you guys lowering your salt intake? The DASH diet has shown to help. You might also want to research beets & hibiscus tea. I think they do as well as the drugs in test studies.

[Merkin]

Are you guys lowering your salt intake? The DASH diet has shown to help. You might also want to research beets & hibiscus tea. I think they do as well as the drugs in test studies.

I have been reducing it for years, due to my wife having high blood pressure. We always buy salt free products when we can, such as chicken stock, canned tomatoes and so on. I made burgers last night, and added no-salt hamburger seasoning.

Even low sodium chicken stock is not low sodium, so we buy the no salt added chicken stock.

[Chicat]

Are you guys lowering your salt intake? The DASH diet has shown to help. You might also want to research beets & hibiscus tea. I think they do as well as the drugs in test studies.

I have been reducing it for years, due to my wife having high blood pressure. We always buy salt free products when we can, such as chicken stock, canned tomatoes and so on. I made burgers last night, and added no-salt hamburger seasoning.

Even low sodium chicken stock is not low sodium, so we buy the no salt added chicken stock.

Sounds terrible (no offense).

[dovecanyoncat]

Are you guys lowering your salt intake? The DASH diet has shown to help. You might also want to research beets & hibiscus tea. I think they do as well as the drugs in test studies.

I have been reducing it for years, due to my wife having high blood pressure. We always buy salt free products when we can, such as chicken stock, canned tomatoes and so on. I made burgers last night, and added no-salt hamburger seasoning.

Even low sodium chicken stock is not low sodium, so we buy the no salt added chicken stock.

Aside from restaurant meals there's virtually no salt in our diet of DASH and Mediterranean food. Love beets; had 'em yesterday. Hate hibiscus tea; drink it all the time.

Sounds terrible (no offense).

Kiss my Boomer butt, whippersnapper.

[Longhorned]

If you want to reduce salt, reduce condiments. The only condiments I regularly use these days are mustard, ketchup, mayo, sriracha, Mexican hot sauces, soy sauce, fish sauce, worcestershire sauce, amba, and maybe just a handful of others.

[Chicat]

Kiss my Boomer butt, whippersnapper.

You mind if I sprinkle some MSG on it first?

[UAEebs86]

If you want to reduce salt, reduce condiments. The only condiments I regularly use these days are mustard, ketchup, mayo, sriracha, Mexican hot sauces, soy sauce, fish sauce, worcestershire sauce, amba, and maybe just a handful of others.

[dovecanyoncat]

Kiss my Boomer butt, whippersnapper.

You mind if I sprinkle some MSG on it first?

I figure you'll happily pucker if I sat in a puddle of craft bourbon.

[Chicat]

Kiss my Boomer butt, whippersnapper.

You mind if I sprinkle some MSG on it first?

I figure you'll happily pucker if I sat in a puddle of craft bourbon.

Stop flirting with me you saucy minx.

[dovecanyoncat]

Kiss my Boomer butt, whippersnapper.

You mind if I sprinkle some MSG on it first?

I figure you'll happily pucker if I sat in a puddle of craft bourbon.

Stop flirting with me you saucy minx.

You say that to all the boys when you're at the office pretending to work.

[scumdevils86]

I use msg quite frequently

[Merkin]

I benefited from your post about Weil's breathing technique, and it led me to use box breathing https://quietkit.com/box-breathing/ to lower my overall anxiety and BP when I measure it. BP measurement in the Dr's office is virtually worthless in my case: not only do they yammer at you while the cuff bleats away, they violate every other protocol simply out of logistical necessity. So I have to do it at home. I tossed the arm-cuff model in favor of the wrist-cuff model because it doesn't bug me nearly as much.

At home I find my overall anxiety level falls if I do a few important things: reduce my reading of political articles that emphasize the bizarreness of the right wing in America; exercise nearly every day; get quality sleep; don't drink alcohol everyday (because it unsteadies heartrate, raises BP, and interrupts sleep).

But once basketball season begins, I'm totally fucked.

I identify with all this, but I need to learn box breathing, and I need to look into thT wrist cuff. The usual method freaks me out so much that I stopped taking my pressure at home. It takes about 10 times before I'm calm enough to get a real reading.

Google, get off of my emails!

And soon as I read this, I received an email from my insurance carrier.


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[Chicat]

I like Headspace a lot. #1 on my list of apps I wish I used more often.

[CatsbyAZ]

Joking/Not Joking but I wouldn't object to this thread being moved to the football board until season's unfortunate end.

The older I get the less that sports sways any mental effect over me. Sports are more so an effective way of maintaining an impersonal interest that translates into a way to relate to and socialize with others, whether here on the internet, at live events I attend, or going back and forth about fantasy football on the job.

But man, after losing to Colorado yesterday I haven't felt this hopeless about our football program since our 2011 road loss to Oregon State put us at 1-5 (10 years ago to the week). We had no DL, offense was disorganized, schedule wouldn't give us a break. But the second half of the season still gave us wins over UCLA and ASU and by next season the stadium was full again and the team was a lot of fun to watch.

[Longhorned]

Five weeks ago I started a 25 mg dose of sertraline for anxiety. I couldn't bike or drive well after taking it, so I took it at night, which interfered with my sleep. I lost all my intellectual curiosity and just wasn't interested in anything.

After two weeks, I could bike and drive on it just fine, so I ramped up to 50 mg taken in the morning, with no sleeping problems. My intellectual curiosity returned as strong as ever, and seemingly more so.

Over this past week, it's been the best I've ever felt. Really high energy for physical exercise and intellectual work, but really mellow at the same time. I feel some situational anxiety, but it's just a feeling. It doesn't get in the way of dealing with the anxiety-provoking issue, or make me stop everything else and deal with that issue first. It doesn't grow and become obsessive and catastrophizing. And just taking down time doesn't cause anxiety that I need to mask with productivity. I don't feel like I need to control things. I imagine it's how other people who don't suffer from anxiety generally feel.

[Longhorned]

Is this a bad sign? I've had three meetings with my therapist. Then she gave me a book to read. The author, Don Miguel Ruiz, claims to be a Toltec shaman. There's literally no such thing as a Toltec shaman in the modern world. The back of the book's cover says it's "in the tradition of Carlos Castaneda," so basically this is the elusive Don Juan speaking for himself. I read the book, which reductively promises "Nirvana, or Heaven." Everything in it is either an embarrassing casual formulation, or a poorly understood/misleading notion taken from European or Asian thought, with no discernible Toltec element (which doesn't exist anyway, not even through Aztec sources).

Maybe therapy isn't for me?

[Chicat]

Find a better-read therapist.

[pc in NM]

Is this a bad sign? I've had three meetings with my therapist. Then she gave me a book to read. The author, Don Miguel Ruiz, claims to be a Toltec shaman. There's literally no such thing as a Toltec shaman in the modern world. The back of the book's cover says it's "in the tradition of Carlos Castaneda," so basically this is the elusive Don Juan speaking for himself. I read the book, which reductively promises "Nirvana, or Heaven." Everything in it is either an embarrassing casual formulation, or a poorly understood/misleading notion taken from European or Asian thought, with no discernible Toltec element (which doesn't exist anyway, not even through Aztec sources).

Maybe therapy isn't for me?

What you describe is not “therapy”!! Not even close - it’s new age bullshit!!!

When selecting a therapist, evaluate their clinical practices - any competent clinician should offer an upfront description, answer your questions, and negotiate a treatment plan…

… If you’re being prescribed any psychotropic meds, ask your prescriber for (a minimum of) three references from which you can select.

[Longhorned]

Is this a bad sign? I've had three meetings with my therapist. Then she gave me a book to read. The author, Don Miguel Ruiz, claims to be a Toltec shaman. There's literally no such thing as a Toltec shaman in the modern world. The back of the book's cover says it's "in the tradition of Carlos Castaneda," so basically this is the elusive Don Juan speaking for himself. I read the book, which reductively promises "Nirvana, or Heaven." Everything in it is either an embarrassing casual formulation, or a poorly understood/misleading notion taken from European or Asian thought, with no discernible Toltec element (which doesn't exist anyway, not even through Aztec sources).

Maybe therapy isn't for me?

What you describe is not “therapy”!! Not even close - it’s new age bullshit!!!

When selecting a therapist, evaluate their clinical practices - any competent clinician should offer an upfront description, answer your questions, and negotiate a treatment plan…

… If you’re being prescribed any psychotropic meds, ask your prescriber for (a minimum of) three references from which you can select.

Thank you! I thought I was going the conservative route by seeing the therapist recommended by my doctors at Banner. The office is in the same suite as my PCP. She said we would do cognitive behavioral therapy. I thought that's what we were doing, and then she gave me this book and asked me to read it carefully and take notes.

[dovecanyoncat]

Is this a bad sign? I've had three meetings with my therapist. Then she gave me a book to read. The author, Don Miguel Ruiz, claims to be a Toltec shaman. There's literally no such thing as a Toltec shaman in the modern world. The back of the book's cover says it's "in the tradition of Carlos Castaneda," so basically this is the elusive Don Juan speaking for himself. I read the book, which reductively promises "Nirvana, or Heaven." Everything in it is either an embarrassing casual formulation, or a poorly understood/misleading notion taken from European or Asian thought, with no discernible Toltec element (which doesn't exist anyway, not even through Aztec sources).

Maybe therapy isn't for me?

What you describe is not “therapy”!! Not even close - it’s new age bullshit!!!

When selecting a therapist, evaluate their clinical practices - any competent clinician should offer an upfront description, answer your questions, and negotiate a treatment plan…

… If you’re being prescribed any psychotropic meds, ask your prescriber for (a minimum of) three references from which you can select.

Thank you! I thought I was going the conservative route by seeing the therapist recommended by my doctors at Banner. The office is in the same suite as my PCP. She said we would do cognitive behavioral therapy. I thought that's what we were doing, and then she gave me this book and asked me to read it carefully and take notes.

What else is on the syllabus?

[pc in NM]

Is this a bad sign? I've had three meetings with my therapist. Then she gave me a book to read. The author, Don Miguel Ruiz, claims to be a Toltec shaman. There's literally no such thing as a Toltec shaman in the modern world. The back of the book's cover says it's "in the tradition of Carlos Castaneda," so basically this is the elusive Don Juan speaking for himself. I read the book, which reductively promises "Nirvana, or Heaven." Everything in it is either an embarrassing casual formulation, or a poorly understood/misleading notion taken from European or Asian thought, with no discernible Toltec element (which doesn't exist anyway, not even through Aztec sources).

Maybe therapy isn't for me?

What you describe is not “therapy”!! Not even close - it’s new age bullshit!!!

When selecting a therapist, evaluate their clinical practices - any competent clinician should offer an upfront description, answer your questions, and negotiate a treatment plan…

… If you’re being prescribed any psychotropic meds, ask your prescriber for (a minimum of) three references from which you can select.

Thank you! I thought I was going the conservative route by seeing the therapist recommended by my doctors at Banner. The office is in the same suite as my PCP. She said we would do cognitive behavioral therapy. I thought that's what we were doing, and then she gave me this book and asked me to read it carefully and take notes.

Well, I don’t know what to say!

Is the reading in your treatment plan? I guess I’d be very direct and ask how that reading is consistent with that CBT approach….

In any case, I can share that mutual engagement and trust are critical to the success of any therapy modality, and encourage non-professional friends to seek a change if they feel that might be lacking. Good luck!

[Longhorned]

Thanks. I'm glad we're saying these things on the board instead of by PM, since this is important for anyone else who tackles their depression and anxiety. I think what I lacked was the kind of specificity of the treatment plan you advise, which is clearly important. I think my situation can be understood in that light. In my next meeting, I'm going to ask for that specificity.

[pc in NM]

Thanks. I'm glad we're saying these things on the board instead of by PM, since this is important for anyone else who tackles their depression and anxiety. I think what I lacked was the kind of specificity of the treatment plan you advise, which is clearly important. I think my situation can be understood in that light. In my next meeting, I'm going to ask for that specificity.

One more point - I know nothing about that author or book, and must admit that some of the contents could be consistent with CBT principles. However, I am certain that the supposed/claimed origins (Toltec Shamanism, or whatever) are bullshit, and that alone could cause a seriously skeptical response, if not outright rejection, from a rationally-inclined person (not to mention, a professional academic)!!!

Definitely, there should be a mutually negotiated and agreed upon treatment plan - absent that, the "therapist" could his- or herself behaving like a shaman or guru, entering each session and channeling god-knows-what!!!

[CatsbyAZ]

January through February is consistently my worst time of year for weathering depression. I’m sure it’s seasonal circumstances – cold, dark by 5PM – mixing with the post-Holiday, back-to-work letdown but it’s stark how like seasonal clockwork January becomes a month largely lost to plummeting motivation, inability to write or work effectively, and overwhelmed by various disappointments that I usually tune out. All before emerging into better spirits toward March. Last year was especially empty, lasting until almost April.

[ASUHATER!]

I feel that way about the late springtime. Knowing the endless summer is coming and sweating and heat and just things seem to always pile up in the summer bill wise and everything. This time of year is the good time for me, May and June are the hardest

[Longhorned]

I feel that way about the late springtime. Knowing the endless summer is coming and sweating and heat and just things seem to always pile up in the summer bill wise and everything. This time of year is the good time for me, May and June are the hardest

But that's not seasonal depression in terms of the brain's chemical reaction to its environs.

You really, really need to move Terre Haute.

[Chicat]

I feel that way about the late springtime. Knowing the endless summer is coming and sweating and heat and just things seem to always pile up in the summer bill wise and everything. This time of year is the good time for me, May and June are the hardest

But that's not seasonal depression in terms of the brain's chemical reaction to its environs.

You really, really need to move Terre Haute.

Hit me up if you want some recommendations on the hot restaurant spots.

[Longhorned]

Seasonal depression hits you as an experience of no-color. The atmosphere is like a bucket of dirty sock water. It's not just an absence of light, but also of the colors of the world that come in through your windows, bringing tinges of the blue of the sky and all the mosaic of everything that reflects light.

One day I put one of those tablets in my toilet tank, which turned the water in the bowl blue. Then I could only find happiness while peeing it green. I'd wait for night to fall just to bring that usual sense of artificial illumination.

When you live in a sunny place, it's all salsa, citrus, beer, skin, and the fully embodied magic of a visit to the ATM or waiting to at an intersection. You could live more in just one morning or afternoon than you could an entire winter in Illinois.

[dovecanyoncat]

Seasonal depression hits you as an experience of no-color. The atmosphere is like a bucket of dirty sock water. It's not just an absence of light, but also of the colors of the world that come in through your windows, bringing tinges of the blue of the sky and all the mosaic of everything that reflects light.

One day I put one of those tablets in my toilet tank, which turned the water in the bowl blue. Then I could only find happiness while peeing it green. I'd wait for night to fall just to bring that usual sense of artificial illumination.

When you live in a sunny place, it's all salsa, citrus, beer, skin, and the fully embodied magic of a visit to the ATM or waiting to at an intersection. You could live more in just one morning or afternoon than you could an entire winter in Illinois.

^^^^^^ This X100.Three days of gray overcast weather and I start to get inwardly dark. My brother lives in Portland. I'd rather snort meth.

[Chicat]

Yeah, seasonal depression isn’t about not liking a particular season. Living in a place where the sun is only up for a few hours a day and is barely seen because it’s stuck behind a solid bank of clouds day after day is truly depressing.

[Merkin]

Yeah, seasonal depression isn’t about not liking a particular season. Living in a place where the sun is only up for a few hours a day and is barely seen because it’s stuck behind a solid bank of clouds day after day is truly depressing.

Having growing up in South Central Michigan, then moving to Colorado Springs, I truly had no idea you could have snow on the ground and the sun could be out. It was fantastic.

Even as a kid many years ago, you could get daylight sun spectrum lighting for your house to help with the doldrums.

Watching Fargo reminds me so much of what it was like in Michigan, with the dreary skies.



Now I move to Colorado, and see these on the slopes!

[dovecanyoncat]

Merkin is right. When I moved from Missoula to Boulder it was like discovering a new planet where women were radiant vivacious creatures even in February.